I remember the first time I really acknowlegded you as a father was after you gave me this very large wad of
I remember how excited I used to get when my mum tells me we are going to Badagry; I would be on my best behaviour for days on end so that she doesn't change her mind- oh Papa, I was in love with you! How the butterflies used to flutter in my belly just at the mere thought of seeing you smile.
I remember the first time you introduced me to my siblings and we sat in front of that famous statue @ Primus to capture the moment. Our first family trip to Whispering Palms, Seme Boarder and all the other wonderful sites you took us to visit. You had so much knowledge about so many things you could have easily been mistaken for the tour guide.I admired your humility, the way you commanded presence and brought life even to a dead atmosphere. Those are some of the memories I hold on to very dearly.
Then I became a teenager and fell out of love with you, my first love. I wanted you to be like this dad I'd heard about or that dotting father I'd seen in a movie completely forgetting that you are an individual who only has his own experiences to go by and that there was no manual on being a father -one can only do it as he dims fit. I began to inwardly resent you and looked forward to the times when I could get away from you and your ways. I remember my friends at school used to say " your dad is cool" and I used to think "pfft! If only you lived with him".
Then came the maturation of my mind when I discovered the truth about life and began to really appreciate some of the great efforts and lengths you went to to unite us! The times we would all come together at Christmas, Easter and other Holidays; not because we really wanted to but because "Dokki Dokki" had exercised his "veto power"! How could I forget the lovely meals Mr Abel used to prepare for us it could have been compared to living in a palace! You tried your best to provide for us the best you could but at the time, I didn't think it was good enough. I remember how you used to patiently teach me Simultaneous Equation but gave up after 3years!! *Sorry dad, I still don't get it* :-)
When I moved to the UK, my mum would call me up sometimes as early as 4am to ask me "when was the last time you called your dad?". In those days, I couldn't understand why she bothered with you or worked so hard to make me maintain some sort of relationship with you but now I know- its simply because no one lives without making mistakes and its ok to make those mistakes because we learn from them. In hindsight, I am very grateful she made me make those calls albeit begrudgingly because these days, I would give much to hear your voice on the other end of a phone conversation.
I remember my 2006 Christmas holiday in Badagry and how I fell in love with you again; I loved your greying beard and the charismatic look that came with it, I loved seeing the dotting grandfather you had become to our Oluwatobi- a side to you I never thought existed! That holiday opened my eyes to the things I'd missed out on by holding on to an emotion that ate me up inside and that you never even knew existed. I began to look forward to the very next time I would call you or you'd call me till that sad Tuesday night when I called you and you dismissively told me you needed to get some sleep. I knew something wasn't right so rather than bug you too much, I decided to pray for you. I was suppose to call you back at some point but I thought to allow you maximum recuperating time. Sadly, that choice was taken out of my hands as on the Sunday of the same week, 24th of June, 2007, you passed into glory. I cannot forget the accurately chosen text from 2Timothy 4:7 on your funeral service booklet that read "I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith". It was indeed accurate for you because that is exactly what you did daddy. Everyone has an assignment on earth and I'm certain you gave yours the best you could.
Five years on, I still very much miss you and sadly regret those many years my love for you turned sour. I really didn't get a chance to tell you were loved and that I was (and still very is) proud of you. We continue to strive to make great achievements like you did and even much more. You'll be very proud of us and the life choices we've made. Your family continues to expand; you've gained 2 beautiful daughters and 3 wonderful sons and we are all well looked after daddy. You should see your grandchildren they are so beautiful and smart. Its obvious for anyone to see that they have something of your blood flowing through their veins. We will continue to make you proud and celebrate the wonderful life you lived. It is indeed a privilege and great honour to be a direct descendant of a noble man like you and I thank you for blessing me with these wonderful people I call my brothers and sisters.
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